Skip to main content

Cut It Out, Winter! You Jerk.

  • Author:
  • Updated:

I'm gonna straight shoot you here—I'm kind of bummed. I think I have Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD, one of my favorite acronyms) or something. I've been snowed in like an eskimo in an igloo since October, right now it's raining icicles outside, and I haven't seen the sun since back when Mark Wahlberg was Marky Mark. (Mark Wahlberg is the guy who plays the wisecracking, blue-collar Boston dude in every single movie ever made about blue-collar Boston. He used to be a rapper named Marky Mark. He wasn't very good.) Anyway, you know that scene in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom when Indiana and the little kid from The Goonies slide down a snow-covered mountain in an inflatable boat? That's how I got to work today. This is how I'm getting home. It's like water skiing, except it's on snow, because that's all there is outside. Snow.