“Hang On. No, Seriously.”
Against all odds, I found myself piled into a golf cart with ten shrieking 12-year-old Bahamian girls, three bags of stinking garbage, and one half-Maori driver named Fuzzy Nuts. To passers-by, I must have looked like a big weirdo and possibly a pervert. But I can explain! I was taking part in a clean-up competition among local school children in Bimini. And there was a palpable competitive zeal in the air, as the winning team would receive a worthy prize indeed—a ride on Kawasaki’s new Ultra 300 line of Jet Skis, the most powerful ever built.
With its 300-horsepower engine, the 300 series easily tops out at its preset limit of 67 mph—a speed at which you don’t so much cut through water as skip across it like a stone on a pond. (You know you hit 60 when your goggles are mashed into your face and your cheeks billow out from the wind blast.) But top speed wasn’t what I found most impressive. It was the acceleration. When I first got on, one of the Kawasaki guys told me, “Hang on. [He paused a second] No, seriously.” He wasn’t kidding. The 300X goes from 0 to 60 in the blink of an eye and with a burst that will literally knock you backwards (and if you’re in Bimini, straight into shark-infested waters) if you’re not laying into that handlebar with a serious kung-fu grip. (The lumbar-supporting cushion on the 300LX effectively mitigates this “problem.”) But even with all this speed, each of the 300 series Jet Skis I rode maintained Barry Sanders-like agility without sacrificing stability. I ran the boats in a respectable chop just outside the Gulf Stream and yet still felt comfortable pinning the throttle and screaming across the aquamarine expanse. I’m not gonna lie to ya, I like going fast. If you do too, a 300 series Jet Ski from Kawasaki is the perfect toy to complement your boat. If you end up running yours in Bimini, please don’t toss any trash overboard, because one barehanded garbage clean-up under a baking-hot tropical sun was just fine for me, thank you.